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We’re all trying to keep it together, are we not?
How are you feeling about today? Me? Overwhelmed. Politics, still a pain; climate change, a concept too strange…for many. Not everyone’s on the same page. I fear ending up in the same room with people with different views sometimes. For peace of mind’s sake, I’d prefer those with whom I wouldn’t have to pretend that I’m alright with a life concept other than my own. I speak my mind too hard. And I know I’m not always right, but common sense sticks around, I like to believe, and reality checks itself all the time, in my mind. I’ve learned through time that, under the same roof, it’s better to keep…
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Words – they mean things
Big, like an enthusiastic move like today’s news like my dreams my energy, like my blues Bright, in my eyes, like the light in my room Soft, like my touch, like my shadow like my heart like my voice Deep, like my soul like your sleep like my love like the ocean; a cliché we all know I must do Painful, like a period like last year like the days you weren’t near Lonely, Like the desert like a ship in the open sea like the new me overseas like Britney in ’99 Like wandering eyes in the twilight Beautiful, like some words like kindness, like spring like a genuine…
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Outcomes: real life at a glance
How about a short and sweet thought? Sometimes, the decisions you make won’t be the smartest, the most appropriate, or sensible. Maybe not even the most affordable. Mistakes will be made. But whether it was worthy or worthless, too much or too little — it was your decision. And it was important to you at some point. And, it mattered to you that you were in charge and it mattered that you had a say. So don’t look back with a regretful gaze; you got your way. Make the best of every possible outcome and make peace with your mistakes.
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What I Thought I Knew
I said people could stay friends after a breakup because I felt it in my heart that it was true. I thought I knew the other sides’ sentiments, but maybe what I thought I knew wasn’t true. When the “Dear” becomes just a “Hi” you’re left wondering why. I thought you couldn’t be hated for no reason. I thought being yourself was the ultimate admission that you love your character and, thus, others would do the same — because rumor has it, no one likes the fake. I thought people could only change for the better and seeing karma bite their asses would be the best feeling ever. Every year…
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Growing Apart — in short
One day, you learn that life is just going to have a lot of inevitable turns. Then, it’ll take another day for you to accept that reality. Yet, another day comes when you realize that, after all, you’re as unprepared as you were before any of those turns happened, to anchor yourself. To expect, to anticipate such changes — which, if one is lucky, may not happen at all — is not the same as walking by them, through them despite the warning. Feeling the shift with every conversation, with every heartbeat, every memory…quietly fading away. You might not always notice when you’re growing apart from someone, but when you…
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Rambling in no particular order
Once I close that notebook and force the fat messy sharpie down the spiral binding, my brain understands that the day is over. And it rejoices. It is, indeed, a good feeling knowing you finished one or two tasks, when you’ve been so “ADD.” Even when knowing you’ll have to do it all over again tomorrow, the end of a day is an escape our brain needs and deserves. My question is: does it ever really feel complete? It may feel like a life sentence if you hate what you do. That’s a good question: are you truly happy with the job you do for a living? I think a lot…
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The Crumbs They Call Affection
I ask myself today what’s changed? Heart beating with the same ache, People I’ve loved so long can’t reciprocate, And I settled for crumbs they call affection Given all my attention, dealt with their rejection; I understand it was f—ked up, in retrospection. Today I tried to numb the pain again, day by day, But how long ‘til I no longer feel this way? Heaven knows I tried, from the Milky Way and back Years have passed, but I keep falling into the crack And it’s here I stay, unsure if it’s in my brain Or if the efforts’ been all in vain, And it’s just a no-destination train. My…
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The Fear of Being Stuck
The fear of being stuck in life… It’s like looking around and just knowing, you were born to do more; you can do more than this. It’s like seeing the end of the day every single day, knowing you can’t but wishing you could change the sunset’s hues. It’s like pushing against a brick wall ‘til your bones crack, when you haven’t even moved. It’s like force-feeding yourself because you know that’s all there is. It’s learning to be patient with yourself and the custom-made world we live in. It’s being mega careful with which doors you exit and which ones you enter through. The fear of being stuck in…
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2020 Resentment and Gratitude
Like every year, we do a little reflection on the year that just went by. But like no other year, that I know of, this year gave us a little extra to think about, learn, be thankful for, perhaps regret, and even love. Here are some of the things that I learned and resented this year. I found out that it ain’t true, that your heart can’t break when it wasn’t whole to begin with, because the fragments, every broken piece multiplies, actually. I learned about the agony that sprouts out of a rootless relationship; out of missing something that just isn’t there, that never was, and won’t ever be.…
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Signs that You Need a Hobby
And I mean a real life hobby, away from technology. I’ve been wondering lately: do I need to chill on the productivity obsession or do some people in your life really need to find a hobby? Perhaps the answer is both. But right now I’m just writing about the people who have too much time on their hands ( like, how?!) when there’s so much they could be doing. My introverted moments get interrupted quite a lot. No matter how much I tell some people that I absolutely need my creative alone and quiet time, they still don’t seem to understand what that entails. When people call you repeatedly just…
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Mean every word
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